Loving ourselves no matter what our size.

As I get older, I can't help but think about the whole weight and body image thing.  I've had my share of ups and downs when it comes to my body, and I'm sure you can relate. 

But you know what I've come to realize? It's all about embracing and loving yourself, no matter what size you are. ❤️

Let's collectively ditch the overthinking about our size and celebrate our bodies for all the amazing things they can do! 🎉 So here's to self-love, acceptance, and rocking our unique sizes with style and grace!

The Peleton Post from @iamicaniwillido: https://www.instagram.com/reel/C2cu4k7rKHT/?igsh=MWpwbnhhb2Y4ODE5ag==

Dietitian Anna's Post @dietitiananna : https://www.instagram.com/p/CvhXo8zuUYO/?igsh=MTFsbmhtc282dTZ5OQ==

Transcript

Shana: 0:00

Welcome back to how it's really going with Shayna record today's episode. I want to talk about weight and getting older. A bit of a springboard from the perimenopause episode that I did last week. If you haven't listened to that yet, it is all about perimenopause and my journey through perimenopause and the symptoms and things in the frustrations. Just everything that I've experienced since realizing that I was actually going through peri-menopause. So if you haven't checked that out, please do. And I would say that this is a branch of that episode because. The fluctuating weight that I've noticed in my own body is definitely part of going through menopause and the hormone fluctuations. But I just wanted to just talk about weight in general, I'm speaking for all women when I say this, maybe I shouldn't be, but I feel like. Wait and thinking about our weight and our size and all of that stuff is just such a big part of being a woman. And it really fucking sucks and I hate that. How we look physically is been such an important. Thing, for us to have to think about like, it's not important, but we've made it important. Society has made it important. And that we feel we are not as good or good enough, or that we don't fit in. If we're not a certain size and. I just, I'm just so done with that. Like I have. I feel like if this is actually the funny thing. Is I've felt like this my whole life. I have been somebody who has worried and thought about my weight, my whole life. And when I look back at pictures, when I'm in my twenties, I worried and thought about it. When I was in my thirties, I worried and thought about it. And now for sure, my forties, I'm worrying less about it, but I definitely still think about it. But I look back at pictures of me and my twenties and my thirties and fuck. I was so fucking skinny. Like what was I worried and thinking about. I, I remember when I was in my twenties and thirties, I don't even know exactly where it was, but probably my twenties. Like I used to have a journal where I used to journal about the food that I was eating and like, We would take supplements that were I'm certain were not good for us. To keep us, skinny. I remember taking this one called pro NZ. 99. And it was like, my heart rate went like through the roof when I would take that, but I didn't care because it made me skinny. There were so many things that I was doing back in that time of my life. When I, what was I thinking? I was definitely thin. I mean, I don't even know what I weighed back then. But we're sure as hell a lot less than what I weigh now. And I was concerned about it back then. And so, it's like we can't win. You. It's like we can't win no matter what size we are, no matter what. Is going on, we're still constantly thinking about our weight and how our jeans fit and how thin we look. And I am frankly, over it. I'm over it. Now that doesn't mean that it's it's gone from my consciousness to think about it. I know for me, one of the things that I'm really working on right now, as I'm moving closer and closer to 50, I just turned 48. This past year in 2023. I am working on my mindset and accepting my body as it is, and feeling good about myself, regardless of what size of jeans I'm wearing and really just. Embracing and accepting and loving my body because here's the thing. I work out, I try and eat healthy. I'm not perfect. I definitely enjoy life and I enjoy food and I try and make better choices. But I'm not somebody who's super strict and super restricting. I, if I want to have a bowl of ice cream at night, I will have a bowl of ice cream. I'm not going to not enjoy the things in life. But I'm also, working to eat more protein and I'm trying to work out three to five times a week. And I'm doing things to, to help myself feel healthy and to feel strong. But what I'm really working on letting go of from a mindset perspective is doing those things to stay thin.'cause I feel like trying to be thin is a losing battle one for me. And two it's not. It's not doing. For me, my mental health, any favors, and I think. The thing we need to work on as a society, especially well, for women as a society. And I'm not saying that men don't go through this, like my husband, I had this conversation the other day and he said, men. Do think about this stuff and they are, but it's just societal, what is the word? From a society standpoint or a conditioning standpoint, it's okay for a guy to be a bit overweight. We're not all going oh my gosh. If a guy puts on 10 pounds or whatever, no, one's really talking about it or saying anything about it, in my experience. And maybe they do think about this more than I, I think they do, but I do believe that from a women's. Perspective, it is much more of a, an issue. Then it is for guys. I don't know, it seems that way to me anyways. But. What I believe and what I am working towards is just having a good relationship with my body in the sense that if I'm healthy and strong at whatever size that is. That is what is good for me. And that's what I am working on. Really accepting with myself. It's funny because I was just chatting a friend of mine on Facebook messenger, because I was, I had purchased a weighted vest. Because Dr. Mary, Claire Haber, who is a menopause specialist. And women's health specialist. She recommended wearing a weighted vest when you're either doing your workouts and, or just walking to help, it helps raise your heart rate. It helps with bone density. It helps with muscle mass. And it helps to create more of that zone two cardio, which is really good for us. I don't know all the specifics behind it. I'm not that into it, but I just know that a lot of people talk about zone two cardio and that the weighted vest really helps with that. I'm somebody who I will, if you say it's good, I will do it. So anyhow, I bought one and I w I did a little Instagram on it. And my friend messaged me saying, oh, that she had gotten one too. And we were just talking about how she's like, I've put on 10 pounds in this last year. And she's I don't know why. Like I, obviously she's also in perimenopause as well. And, we're just talking about jeans, fitting tight and all these stuff, and I'm just like, Like, Why can't we just accept ourselves? And know that as we get older, these things are going to change and that's okay. And that's just part of the process. Sure does it have to be, could we go extra hard and work out, Six days a week and, cut back on calories and really do all these things to help mitigate the weight gain. A hundred percent we could, but most people aren't going to go to that extreme to try and keep a thin frame. Like it's just not feasible for everyone. Everyone could do it. Yes. But not everyone is going to do it. And I feel like it's a small percentage that would actually go to that extreme to stay thin. And it's not something that I'm willing to do. I'm willing to work out and be healthy, but I'm also wanting to find the balance between enjoying my life, having those workouts feeling strong, but also being okay with. The size that I am, whatever size that is. And not feeling like I'm less than which I know is a me thing. I totally get that. It's a me thing. When I walk into a group. And I feel bigger than everybody else. And I'm starting to feel self-conscious. All those things. I get that. That's a me thing that, whether other people are thinking that or not is none of my business. But it is something that I don't want to do anymore. I don't want to walk into a room and do that anymore. I want to walk into a room and just feel good about the fact that I'm with friends and that I feel good and strong with myself, regardless of what size I am. And that's for me, the mental piece of what I'm working on right now. As somebody who's, gearing towards menopause fairly quickly as I'm moving into my fifties and accepting myself. And I watched this video. It was a Peloton video from one of the Peloton instructors. And I want to find her name because I want to give her credit. And if you do find this, please absolutely listen to it. It was so good. Someone sent it to me, my friend, Kristin sent it to me so the video is a Peloton video from Christine DEC role, she's one of the. The instructors on Peloton and she is, I am, I can, I, will I do on Instagram? And her message was. You know how she's like someone asked her how she stays so positive as she's getting older and all these things. And I think she's the referencing the fact that she is not the same size that she used to be when she was, major cycler and all the things. And she just says, it's not easy to stay positive. It is a mindset shift that you have to make, and it's about appreciating your body. And appreciating all the things that your body has done for you. My body has produced three children. I have done some things to my body that probably weren't so great. Back in the days. And my body has recovered from those things, and, it's just like being grateful for our bodies and the fact that they have done hard things for us. And, we've gone through things in our lives and our bodies are still working for us, and I just. How do we come to a place where we collectively just appreciate our bodies for what they are regardless of the size. And I just feel like. My metabolism is changing, my body structure is changing. Regardless of what I do, it doesn't seem to mitigate some of those things. I feel like I work out more than I ever have now. And it's that much harder to keep things in check. And at some point I'm just going to be okay with it. And that's what I'm working towards is like just being okay with the fact that. I'm wearing a different size now and that things look different and I am just going to own it and just feel good about the fact that I have a strong body. That works for me every single day. And that I have my health and that's what, that's the message that I really want to share. And that's the message that I want my daughter to feel like. I want her to know that. Whatever size she is fine. The major thing that we want to focus on is, are you healthy? Are you making good choices? Are you working out to be strong so that, when you are in your sixties, seventies, eighties, You can get up off the toilet kind of thing, and you can, travel the world and still feel healthy I want that to be the message, I just wanted to turn on the mic and talk about this because it is really difficult as somebody who, feels that pressure. To be thin and I just want to say like, I'm over it, I'm over it. And it's not that I'm saying I'm giving up and I'm not going to try. It's that I'm going to change the narrative around why it is that I'm working out. Why it is that I'm trying to make healthy choices and it's not to fit into a certain size it's so that I can feel healthy and strong and that I can get up off the floor without. Feeling like I I'm going to fall over or that. You know that I can't get up off the floor kind of thing. And make that the focus of why I'm doing the things that I do. It's why I have the weighted vest. It's why I do my workouts. It's why I'm trying to make healthier choices and add more protein to my diet and get rid of some of the refined sugars and, but also on the flip side, I also want to enjoy my life. And I also want to, do things that are fun and eat good food and not have to sit there and think about how many calories and how many. Carbs and how many things like I want the balance. And that balance is going to come with probably, some extra pounds and that's okay. And that's okay. That's what like that is. Okay. And we should be good with that. Like that's living a good life. And maybe it's my own pressures that I put on myself and, maybe, it's my own thing. I don't know. I don't feel like I'm alone in this. But I do feel like society, as a whole has put this. Pressure on women to be a certain size and to look a certain way in order to be considered. Good looking or sexy or attractive, or like you're good enough. All of that shit. And it's unfortunate that's the way that it's been. I really hope that the narrative moving forward for our daughters and our daughters, daughters is that. It's about being healthy and strong. At whatever size that ends up being. And because healthy in strong is not the same for everyone. Especially as we age. My healthy and strong at age 20 is looking different than it was at age 30 after three, after two, three kids that, and it's gonna look different at 40 and it's gonna look different at 50 and it's gonna look different at 60. and we have to be okay with that. I don't think it's typical. Nor is it normal for someone to be the same size right through until they're a hundred. I'm sure it happens. And I'm sure people work really hard to make that happen, but I don't think it's typical and I don't think that we should be expecting to be the same size throughout our whole life, because that is that's, what's fucking us up is that we think that it should be easy or we should be working towards being the same. Weight and size our whole life. And it's not about that at all. It's about being healthy and strong. Whatever that looks like, and it's going to look different at each that's should be the norm. Right? So. I don't know, I just I'm just done with it. I just want to put on my clothes in the morning and be like, you know what? You look great. You feel good? You're healthy. You, woke up this morning. Who cares if you're wearing a size 12 or a 10 or whatever size jeans you're wearing, who the fuck cares? Just go out and live your life. You don't know how much time you have stopped worrying about your weight. Just go and enjoy. And that's what I want to get to. And I, I'll be honest. I'm not a hundred percent there yet. But every day. I get closer and closer to it because it's just so exhausting. Having to think about it all the time. And my husband, I went out for dinner last night. I wore jeans that I've worn out, many times. I felt like I looked nice, but I could feel that my jeans were tight. And I could feel that like, when we were sitting down to dinner, I popped open the button because it was getting tight, especially after I had eaten. And I was just like, you know what? I think I just need to not wear these right now, or maybe get another size bigger so that I can feel comfortable when I'm out. Instead of trying to suck myself into jeans that are tight and feel uncomfortable all night, which for what? Right? Like who cares? My husband loves the way that I look, he thinks it's great. He doesn't care. And so why does it matter? So anyways, if you are struggling with this as well, and you are feeling the feelings that I have been feeling. I think we need to band together in in the sense that we need to start spreading the message that it's okay to change your body is going to change. And it's okay. Just continue to keep working on being healthy and making healthy choices, and working out to be strong working out so that your bones and your muscles are working for you as you age, instead of working out to try and stay in a size six or a size, whatever. And really just, just make that the norm. It's great. If you want to be, To the extreme on either end of this conversation. You do you everybody's going to do their thing. But I think There are more of us who are in that space of. Trying to do something that just isn't going to work for us because we're not willing to make the lifestyle changes that need to be made. In order to stay a certain size. And for those of us who are in that boat, we just need to mentally get ourselves to that space. That says it's okay to not be the size you were when you were 30. It's okay. That your body's changing. And that things fit differently and maybe you look differently in the mirror. And it's okay. You're still beautiful. You're still strong. You're still healthy. It just looks different. It's just, the package is changing. That doesn't mean your changing. It doesn't mean that you're better or worse or any of those things. It just means you're in moving into a new phase of life and it's okay. And you're still worthy of all the things that you were worthy of before. You're not anything less. You're just as amazing. You just come in a bit of a different package. And I think that's what we really just need to accept within ourselves. That's what I want to say. So I'd love to hear from you. If you listened to this episode and you feel me on this. I would love to hear from you in my DMS on Instagram. I love when you guys message me on Instagram and share your thoughts about these episodes, because this is why I turn on my mic and do this is because I want to have conversations and talk about how things are really going. And help others feel like they're not alone. that's my purpose here. So if you felt this in any way and you want to reach out, you can do it either at, I am Shana Recker on Instagram or feel free to message me on my. Art account, which is Shana. Recker underscore art I'm available on both. And yeah. So if you're in this boat, just love yourself today. Give yourself a squeeze. Don't worry about what how your jeans fit. Go put on some stretchy pants, make some healthy choices. Give yourself some zone, two cardio or a weight workout. This week and help get strong and yeah, we'll see you on the next episode. All right, everyone. We'll talk to you soon. Bye. For now.