Ditching the pressure: How getting a job can help create balance as an entrepreneur

Have you ever felt super overwhelmed and burned out by the constant demands of social media and entrepreneurship? I know I have. In this episode, I share my personal journey of finding balance and peace by stepping away from the relentless hustle of entrepreneurship and taking a part-time job. This decision not only provided financial stability but also greatly improved my mental health and happiness. The pressures and stresses associated with social media and business coaching can be overwhelming, and I open up about the challenges I faced and the negative impact it had on both my personal and professional life.

This episode serves as a reminder that it's okay to seek balance and prioritize mental health in the pursuit of success. 

Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:00

Hey guys, welcome back to How It's Really Going with Sheena Rekker, and this is a podcast episode that has been requested multiple times from you guys, after I did my recent post on Instagram where I talked about two parts. One was the stresses of social media and entrepreneurship, and the second part was where I talked about how getting a part-time job or even a full-time job to help support you while you are being an entrepreneur and building your business, why that is not something to feel shame about, and how the industry and entrepreneurship and especially in coaching and in network marketing as well how that is actually looked down upon as a sign of you're not successful, you're not good enough, you're not whatever, and I know that to be true because, one, i felt that myself, but two, since posting that, multiple people have messaged me saying this is a conversation that needs to be had. I have felt this too. Please do an episode about that, talk about this stuff, because it needs to be said, and so this is why I turned on my mic today and I'm sharing with you guys And I don't even know where to begin with this, but let's just dive into it The reason I did the post. it was actually a clip from my last podcast episode where I was saying how much happier I am now that I have this part-time job, now that I'm on social media so much less, now that I am not thinking about my next sale so much and all that kind of stuff, and I'm a much happier person because of all of that.

Speaker 1: 1:41

And it took me stepping away from my coaching business and stepping away from social media and stepping away from all of that to realize the unhealthy connection that I had with social media and being an entrepreneur And that when I was offered this job at the beginning, i was very much like a hell. No, i'm an entrepreneur. I am quote unquote successful. I shouldn't need a job. But for me, my soul was saying, yes, take this job. One, you need the income because my business has been struggling. And two, you need to get away from social media. You need something that you can rely on for some steady income, but that doesn't require you to show up on social media to find your next client or to find your next paycheck. And so for me, i took the job because I knew somewhere deep inside that that's just what I needed to do, and even though it was a little bit hard on my ego, not because there's any shame in the job that I took. I love what I'm doing. It's absolutely fun, it's amazing Sure income wise is it where I was hourly wage as a coach or even as a graphic designer?

Speaker 1: 2:58

No, but to me it didn't really matter so much. It was more about the mental health piece of taking this job and stepping away from these things and having a little bit of secure income than it was about the money, and I've talked about that in previous podcast episodes as well as how doing things for the money is never really good Doing things. Sure, we need to make money, we need to put a roof over our heads and have food and all of those things But I wasn't taking this job necessarily for the money. The money is great, it's a nice little added bonus at the end of the week kind of thing but it wasn't the main reason why I took the job. The main reason why I took the job was because I needed something different in my life that I could rely on for income but also didn't require me to have to be on social media. So there's two parts to this conversation.

Speaker 1: 3:53

One is this whole piece of entrepreneurship, online entrepreneurship and relying on social media to find your next client. I know a lot of us with social media. It is great. Social media has changed the online business game. It's changed entrepreneurship. We can be connected to millions and millions of people on a free platform and share value and find clients without having to pay for ads. Yes, you can pay for ads and get that result quicker, but you don't have to. You don't have to have a bricks and mortar business. You don't have to have, I'm going to say the yellow pages For those of us who are old enough to know what the yellow pages are. But you don't have to put an ad in the yellow pages. It's basically free marketing for businesses, and so it's great.

Speaker 1: 4:43

I have been so blessed thanks to social media. It's helped me build both back when I was doing my network marketing business and my coaching business. I wouldn't have created and generated the income and the client base that I have if it wasn't for social media. So it definitely has the positives and it's there. But there is also the duality, the dark side of social media, which is now not. Everybody's experience is going to be the same as mine.

Speaker 1: 5:11

I get that, but in my experience, i ended up having this dependency on social media. It was like I needed to be on social media to feel like I was relevant. I needed to show up on social media to feel like I was making progress in my business. If I didn't show up on social media, if I wasn't sharing value, if I wasn't creating my next post, if I wasn't thinking about what I was posting next, i was feeling behind. I was feeling like something like I was missing out and that I was going to you know like, where is my next client going to come from? Oh, it's going to come from social media. So I better keep showing up there in order to create an income, so I can pay my bills.

Speaker 1: 5:50

And so it became the sort of like weird vicious circle of me feeling like constantly needing to be with my phone in my hand and sharing some sort of value or sharing some sort of piece of content, and being in front of people in order to Feel like I was doing enough in order to find the clients, in order to get the the next You know person to sign up, in order to receive the income, in order to be able to pay the bills. Like it was just became this, like you know, this constant Need of of having to show up in order to create success, and That's where my mental health started, you know, definitely taking a turn, and you know I have talked about a lot of different things in the past couple of months about, you know, me and the shifts that I've had, and you know there's been the perimenopause stuff which I know has played a role in my Moods and my you know a lot of different things and my thoughts and in my mental health. But I know that, yes, that has definitely impacted a lot of you know, things that I've been changing. It's because of that I've been making changes in my life health-wise, but since taking this part-time job and Closing down the coaching and stepping away from social media To the degree that I was before I left coaching, it's been in that stepping away, taking this job and taking that time away from it that has made me really realize how much that was actually Hurting me. And so, in this post that I did, i talked about how taking this part-time job actually saved me, because I Was feeling this, you know, when I was, when I was doing my coaching business and I was on social media all the time I was a miser.

Speaker 1: 7:29

I was miserable, i was bitchy, i was tired, i was anxious. It was playing out my family life. It was playing out, you know, with between me and my husband. It was just playing. It was playing out my business, constantly feeling stressed, you know, worrying about my next paycheck, my next client, the next person that was going to sign up So that I could pay my bills. Because I was solely relying on my coaching business, like I had no real other income. I did have, i do still create, i do still have income from my network marketing business. Even though I don't actively work it, i was still. I still get a monthly paycheck from them. However, that monthly paycheck has diminished quite a bit over the years. So it's about one-tenth of what it was When I was in my prime with that business.

Speaker 1: 8:10

So you know feeling the stress of that getting smaller and smaller each month, plus then the pressure of having to show up all The time to find your like. I was in this vicious cycle and it was Like crushing my soul and I knew that. I can see that now because I've stepped away from it And since stepping away from it and taking this job, i've had multiple people reach out To say to me like, you seem so different, your energy is different, you seem so much happier. Like nothing financially has really changed in my life. It's not like I'm all of a sudden making you know millions of dollars by because of this job, but that's because it's not the money that's changing things. For me It's the, the, the lack of, of, or the, not the lack of, but the, the, the less stress in my life, the I'm not thinking about it as much. I'm not having.

Speaker 1: 9:01

Like you guys can go on my social media. Sure, i still show up there. I still have in my own business I do websites and logos and things like that for entrepreneurs, but it I don't feel the need to show up on my social media every single day in order to find those clients. Those people are now just starting to come to me through referrals. Or if I do post a website on my site, they see it and they like it and they want to get a quote. You know, it's just sort of happening more naturally. It's not forced at all.

Speaker 1: 9:25

And Not only that, like I, just if I show up and post, i show up and post. If I don't, i don't like I don't care, i just I've, for whatever reason Probably because I'm not relying on my business coaching solely to pay my bills. I don't feel this incessant need to show up on social media all the time in order to eat. You know what I mean, and That has been so good for me. Like I feel like a different person, like I feel so much happier in my life because I am not Putting that constant pressure on myself to show up and again. Maybe this is a me thing, maybe I'm the way I'm doing, it is fucked up and it's a problem that only I have. But I don't think that's the truth, because so many of you have reached out to me saying you feel the same way.

Speaker 1: 10:11

And I do believe that is because in the business coaching space, we are taught that we have to show up consistently. We have to, you know, take massive responsibility for our businesses and do the things that we need to do and show up on social media and give value and be consistent and all of those things, and build the brand. And I mean I've taught those things myself because I've been taught those things and I've taught those things to my clients and There is some truth to it for sure, the ones who are Grinding it out and showing up and you know, there every day and and constantly in their stories and doing all the things, for sure they're there, they are getting ahead because they're constantly in people's faces and I mean, yes, you have to still have good value and things like that. You can show up every day and be shitty and not gain business, but so you still have to be good at what you do and you have to have a valuable message. But it's the consistency, right, that that tends to build The brand, that tends to bring in the clients, because more and more people are seeing you, right? so if you're in a space like I was, where I Didn't want to do that anymore, like I just didn't want to have to show up anymore every day, but it feels like in the coaching space specifically, if you're not willing to play that game, then you're losing. You're not gonna have, like I can tell you.

Speaker 1: 11:26

There have been times where I've slowed down on my social media because I was exhausted and burnt out And I could see the reflection in my business, right, if I wasn't launching a program, if I wasn't on there talking about signing up for my masterclass or, you know, joining my next, you know the Next client attractor program, or my next private coaching spot or whatever it was. Then I wasn't making sales because nobody was seeing me if I wasn't showing up online, and it became to a point where I was just like I'm exhausted, i don't want to have to do this anymore. And so I slowed down. And then I started really slowing down and taking a step back and looking at my whole life and realizing wait a minute, i don't want to do this anymore. It wasn't that I didn't love business coaching. I love helping my clients, i love helping people work through problems and all of those things.

Speaker 1: 12:14

I fell in love with marketing myself on social media in order to sell my coaching Because not only just from the exhaustion and the burnout of having to be online all the time, but also because of the ethical and unethical things that I was taught and was implementing and so on and so forth, that I was just like you know what, for multiple different angles, this just doesn't feel right anymore. And so this is when, for me, i was going through all of this that this job opportunity came up. My friend came to me. She's like is there any chance you'd want to do this. And at first my ego was like fuck, no, because I have a business and that looks like I'm a failure if I take a part-time job. Like being honest, that's kind of how I felt. But my soul knew that it was right. My soul knew it was right And here's so.

Speaker 1: 12:58

First of all, she asked me for a full-time position and I was like no, i can't do full-time. I still have clients and things like that. I still do want to have my business. So I turned that down. And then she came back to me and said, hey, there's a part-time one. It'd be a couple days a week. Do you think you'd want to try that? And I'm the type of person where I feel like, if something comes up for me twice, like I feel like that's the universe, kind of going like, hey, there's something in this for you, like you know what I mean. I've talked about the feather, the brick and the mack track. This was the feather getting really loud and saying, hey, here's this opportunity again. And so at that point I decided to take it because I could still have my business and do that. And that's literally what taking that job and taking the pressure off of myself to constantly show up because I was able to create some income. If I didn't sign a client that week or that month, even it was okay, i still had some money coming in.

Speaker 1: 13:48

You know, and but not only that, it was like three days a week where I'm not even on my social media. Like you'll see, there'll probably be times where I have the little blue checkmark on my Instagram or not the blue checkmark, the little blue cross on my circle because I haven't posted anything in my stories and I haven't posted anything on my actual profile and I don't sweat it anymore Where old Shayna would have been like oh shit, i better get something on there. It's been a while, like you know, i would have started freaking out and start creating tons of content and that, that, that that I'm not saying that that's wrong. I'm not saying that being on social media consistently is wrong, but I do feel that there is a pressure that is put on entrepreneurs to be online consistently in order to be relevant And it's unfortunately I believe that's unfortunately partially true And for some people like myself, i could feel it's starting to become an unhealthy relationship with social media and it was affecting me and my personality and who I was and I needed the change.

Speaker 1: 14:56

So if that means that I'm taking this part time job as a way to just recalibrate myself and kind of figure out what's next for me, then that's what I'm doing. And that actually brings me to the second part of this conversation. So there's the one thing with social media and how it can definitely affect our mental health. But to this whole space of if I take a job as an entrepreneur, that means I'm failing, or if I take a job as a network marketer, that means that I'm not, i'm not doing well in my business, you know, especially in the network marketing space, i know that as you, as you get higher up in the ranks and you start making more money in network marketing, it does come across as oh, if you're taking a job, what's wrong? What's wrong Why? why would you do that?

Speaker 1: 15:41

This is supposed to be freedom. This business is supposed to be. You know, give you time, freedom and be with your kids. Why would you take a job? if you're making all this money and have all this freedom, why would you do that? And it gets frowned upon. And because you know, especially in the network marketing space, you know you sell the freedom as part of you know, that's what we used to do is that this can give you an income that will allow you to leave your job and be home with your kids. And then, when you take a job as somebody who is in that space, then that looks bad and you're supposed to be setting an example for your team and you're supposed to be. You know, know, and this is what actually one of my past network marketing friends, when she saw my post and when I was talking about this, messaged me and Karam, if you're listening, hi said this is a conversation that needs to be happening in the network marketing space, because there's a shame that gets put out, or a shame that people feel when they have to take a job or they want to take a job as something different in their lives, but yet, as a leader in network marketing, you're positioned as having this freedom and this thing. So why would you want to do that?

Speaker 1: 16:47

And I remember when I was in the network marketing space and in our team we had somebody who was working part-time at a hospital, somebody who was working. I had a coaching business that I was starting part-time outside of my network marketing. We were all doing things outside of our network marketing business And our leader actually one of our top people got us on a call and shamed us all for doing things outside of our network marketing business because we should be solely focused on building our businesses. We're crazy not to be just solely focused on doing this because of the money, the money, the money, and it's like fuck that. There are multiple reasons why people would take a job in entrepreneurship, whether it's MLM or coaching or whatever, and not all of it has to do with money.

Speaker 1: 17:33

And I think this is the thing We've got to have this conversation and talk about the fact that it's okay to make choices for your life and your business that work for you, regardless of what anybody else thinks. You can be a successful entrepreneur and make millions of dollars and decide you want to work part-time at a fucking salon if you want to, because you like the atmosphere, you like the people, it brings you joy. Or you can also have a business that maybe is struggling to make money because you're new, or maybe you've just you're still figuring it out, or maybe, for whatever reason, you've gone through a season of struggle and you can get a job to help pay the bills while you're figuring out what's going on in your business, and it's okay, you shouldn't feel shame, you shouldn't feel like you can't tell anyone, you shouldn't feel badly about that. Why there is this stigma around people having jobs when they're entrepreneurs whether in MLM or in coaching, is beyond me. It's nobody's business but mine what I decide to do with my life and my income and the choices that I make. So the fact that I felt that little bit of shame when I decided to take the job and started to tell people that I was working in the salon, it wasn't the shame wasn't in the job. The shame was in the fact that I was doing something outside of my business and that felt like my business was a failure. And by saying that I took this job was saying that I was a failure and had to take a job. But where did that come from? Like I didn't just make that up.

Speaker 1: 19:06

There is that stigma in the entrepreneurship industry that you know, when you're an entrepreneur, you're your own boss, you're this free bird that gets to just do all these things and make all this money And it's an amazing thing, but it's also fucking hard. And there are also seasons And there are times where maybe your business is successful and you're making lots of money, but then there are months where your business isn't successful and it's not making money. I don't care who you are. There are seasons in your business And sometimes those things require you to get a job or to do something different. Or sometimes it's your mental health, and you're doing this because you need a break, you want something different, You're tired of it, you don't want to do it anymore, for whatever reason, it doesn't matter. It doesn't matter. You get to make choices in your business and do what you want to do because it feels right for you, and we don't need to one.

Speaker 1: 19:56

We shouldn't look badly at other people who decide to do that and think, oh wow, they must be, they must not be doing well, and even if they aren't doing well, we should be like, hey, look at them, go. Their business is struggling and they're doing what they need to do to get through. Good for them, good for them. No one should have to struggle in their business. No one should have to struggle, and I said this in my stories. I was in my Instagram stories where I was saying that if you try and hang on and you try and just do your business and, even though you're feeling the overwhelm, you're feeling the anxiety, you're feeling the burnout from social media, you're feeling the stress because you need to pay your bills and you're not finding the clients, and you're in that energy of stress and anxiety, you're not making good decisions for your business. It's not helping your business growth. But by taking a job or doing whatever you need to do in order to make the ends meet so that you can feel less stress, less pressure, less anxiety and you can actually think clearly, you're going to make better decisions overall for your business and your business will end up growing because of it. And that's exactly what happened to me The minute I took that job and I stopped doing business coaching and I told my audience that I was now doing Kajabi websites and branding and helping people build their platforms.

Speaker 1: 21:15

And that's what I was doing. That's all I said. I didn't do anything else. I had people starting to come to me saying, hey, i need a quote for a Kajabi site. Oh, hey, i have some sales pages, can you quote these? Oh, hey, i need new branding and I want to revamp my site. Can you quote me on this? And I just started to like because I was able to think clearly about what I actually wanted to do and I was able to create some content here and there for my Instagram that showed some of the websites designs that I had done. I just did a few videos here and there And there wasn't this extreme ugly pressure. It was light, it was airy, it was fun. I posted, it felt good. People reached out and like it's like I wasn't trying to force anything anymore, it was just. It just was. It just was.

Speaker 1: 21:58

And when you give yourself the space, by doing what you need to do in order to make the ends meet, so that you can actually think clearly about what it is that you actually even want and make to make good decisions for your business, maybe you decide you don't want to do that business anymore. Maybe you decide you want to do something else. I don't know what's going to come through when you release that pressure off of yourself, but it will help you make better decisions for your business overall. I promise you that And that's why people have noticed a shift in my energy. It's not because, financially, all of a sudden it's raining money on me or anything like that. It's because I just feel less pressure, i feel less anxiety, i feel like I wake up and I'm like I fucking love going to the salon.

Speaker 1: 22:43

Those women make me so happy, the people that we meet, the clients that you know. When I'm telling you right now, there's like such a joy for me when a client calls and they want to get in to get their hair done in the next day or two, which we all know is technically almost impossible because salons are so busy And then you find them an appointment and they're like, oh my gosh, I'm so excited. Thank you, you know I'm, you know, like you make them happy and that just brings me joy and it's like so much fun. And so I would never have thought that this is something that I would have been doing, but it brings me joy And you know what, at the end of the day, that's what matters. You know, waking up every day and just loving what you're doing.

Speaker 1: 23:22

And I'm not saying that there's not going to be stressful times. I'm not saying that there's not going to be hard times in whatever you do. There's always going to be that. But even in the hard times I'm still a happier person. There's still less pressure, there's still less of the things that I used to deal with And I don't know, i just I just think that if you're soul, you're and you'll know.

Speaker 1: 23:44

Like, for me, i knew, like I didn't know what I needed to do, i just knew I needed something different and I was open to what was coming to me. And I think that's the biggest thing you know in your gut. If you're feeling this stress of social media and your business month after month and you're starting to feel like maybe this isn't you know, you're starting to get that little whisper in your ear that maybe there's something different for you or maybe there's, you know, it's just there's something that needs to change. Be open to what gets presented to you, because that's that's what happened with me. I was open to what was coming to me, even though the first time it came to me I was kind of like no.

Speaker 1: 24:20

But then the second time I was like I read this book called the surrender project by the guy who wrote untethered soul I forget his name off the top of my head, but Michael Singer and it's called the surrender project. And that was ringing through my mind when this opportunity with the salon came up and it was like just surrender This is coming up again surrender to it and just see where it goes. Like worst case. You don't like it, you quit It's. You don't have to stay right, You've got options. And so I just surrendered to what was coming in front of me. And here we are, and you know what, not everybody is got the same opportunities and things as me. I get that. But find something, anything that can help you alleviate some of the pressure, to help you, just whatever it is that you need to do. You know, just be open to opportunities and just see where it takes you. You know, and, like I said, i never would have thought I would been working a front desk at this amazing salon, but here we are And I absolutely love it.

Speaker 1: 25:21

So, and there should be no shame in that, whether you're a network marketer or you're an entrepreneur, or your coach or whatever it is, you do what has what you do what's right for you, and don't let the stigmas and all of the social conditionings in society convince you or sway you to do something that just doesn't feel right because you're worried about what other people are going to think Like we got to let go of that, and I don't know if this comes with age the older I get, the less I give a shit. What other people think, i don't know, but it is definitely. You know. If I could give you one piece of advice out of this whole mumble jumble mess that I'm talking about right now, it is to follow your, follow your inner calling, follow the little voice inside that's deep, that is telling you, and be open to what gets put in front of you Because, honestly, i truly believe you can't force your outcomes. Your outcomes are meant to flow through you, and that's one of the things he talks about in the surrender experiment. I think it's called the surrender experiment or the surrender project, i can't remember, but it's the surrender something by Michael Singer And how we are.

Speaker 1: 26:31

If we just allow the universe to work through us, it will lead us to amazing and incredible opportunities. But if we're always trying to force the outcome and make a certain outcome happen, then you are blocking opportunities for fulfillment and joy and happiness. And that's what I was doing with business coaching. I had it in my mind that I was going to be a successful business coach, a seven figure, 100 K month business coach. That was going to be me, with the 100 million followers on Instagram and I was just going to rock it out and have millions of clients and all the things, and that was what my brain or my ego wanted. But it wasn't until I let go of that. This other stuff started flowing in And, even though it is absolutely, completely the opposite of where I was going before I have been, i am way happier. I am way more satisfied and fulfilled And actually more clients are coming to me through my websites and my design work than I was getting as a coaching. As a coaching client Like, my revenue in the last two months has outdone the revenue that I was making as a coach for the last six months.

Speaker 1: 27:47

So I'm just allowing and it feels really good, and so you need to quit something, start something, take a job to you know, whatever it is, follow your heart, don't worry about what other people think. Just do what feels right for you. That's the right way. That's the right way. And if it's the wrong way, if you make a decision and it doesn't work out, it's still the right way, because that not working out is leading you to the next thing And you couldn't have gotten to that next thing unless that thing didn't work out And you, just, you know, you just have to get used to that. If you're, if you're, just just take a deep breath and release and do the thing that feels right for you, without worrying about what society or anyone else is going to think, and I promise you it'll lead you to great places.

Speaker 1: 28:29

So that is all I wanted to say. I'm sure there's more, but that's just what came through. So, no shame, no stories. Do what's right for you And you know, like I say, no, no one's got time for, no one's got time for for any other bullshit. So, all right, everyone, that's it for me. Thank you so much for listening. We'll talk soon. Bye for now.